insyaAllah

orang kate mendung tak semestinya hujan and

panas tak semestinya sampai ke petang

life is full of surprises

and u got to handle it tough!

be tough..be positive

only than u cud handle d surprises offered!

kenapa Allah bagi kita dugaan?

sebab manusia mudah terleka

if life is too easy,u whine for any imperfections

if life is too happy,u tend to forget that He owns u..n he's d one giving u d happiness

that is enough i guess for us to be positive when it comes to thinking of why we were sometimes given pain and problems..

i kadang2 lupa

mudah jugak leka

jadi bila terlalu suka Allah beri dugaan

ujian datang,untuk duga iman kita

kalau tak kita terlampau hanyut kan?

sebab tu tok penah kata..dugaan hanya datang untuk orang yang mampu hadapinya

cuba atasi dugaan tu dengan berdoa

sebab Dia saja tempat yang patut kita mengadu

itu buat i pikir positif

and sangat yakin sentiasa ada matahari selepas hujan

senyum dan terus ke depan lebih baik

bila kita ikhlas,Allah tahu

bila kita minta Dia bahagiakan kita

insyaAllah..Dia pasti bantu

;')

% ketelusan

rahsia saya rahsia awak juga

rahsia awak,rahsia awak saja..

nice sangatla prinsip awak ni
saya perlu 100% telus
awak pula?__%
(sila isi tempat kosong dengan tulus)

i want to be nobody

saya hebat?
langsung tak
kadang2 rasa nak tinggalkan semua
lebih seronok hidup simple dan indah
macam nak lari..pergi pulau,pergi hutan atau terus pergi bulan
lebih tenang kan?

orang nampak hidup saya menarik
ada 'life' katanya
saya kerja depan kamera,saya belajar tinggi,
hidup saya exciting
tapi tu kata mereka.saya tak bangga

saya penat,saya lebih suka kalau saya jadi anak kampung
tak hidup di kuala lumpur yang semua orang kejarkan sesuatu
sesuatu yang mereka lupa cuma fana

saya ingat saya suka semua ini
tapi makin hari saya makin mahu lari
saya cuma mahu bahagia
saya tidak takut hilang duit atau populariti
saya takut hilang cinta dan keluarga
itu harta saya

im not a mannequin

final exam is just around d corner..
im still here stuck in front of the lappy hoping for a 'tamparan kesedaran tahap gaban' from anyone to bring me back into reality..
its just u know..i need a warm-up!

so,thought of merungkai seribu kesah dlm blog ini..

its not really a kesah..but i suddenly kesah with this thing..
is it me yg tetibe emo or sensitive semacam or is it people around me yg telah mem-pepatungkan i?

okeh,i bukan nak emo2,curse2 or meracau..i just rasa gatal nak tulis on this..

recently,i jadi sgt emo dgn owg sekeliling i..yg sesuka hati mereka cakap apa mereka suka without pikir bout what i feel..baek,i mmg selalu konon2 neutral..i susah nak marah,i tak amik hati tapi..tapi..i da sampai satu tahap where i think i dah xnak jadi diri i yang begitu easy going itu..

i memg sgt open bila ngan my mum and ijan saje..meaning,they're d one yg i akan cakap ape i xpuas ati or ape i xsuka..
but dgn d rest of people i dont have the heart to, sbb i rasa they all dah terbiasa dgn fenomena 'jasmin tidak kesah,die sgt lembot dan dia takkan marah' which now i think its not who i wanna be..bukan i tak suka org kata i baek n easy going tapi i xsuka org gunakan i punye 'easiness' tu untuk pijak and hurt my feelings..

get it?

i dah rimas org suka2 hati nak buat apa kt i
i dah penat org pijak kepala i
i dah benci org gurau sampai xpikir ati i..

all this while,i never take things seriously as others do..org laen maybe da ngamok,merajok tapi i simpan saja..yg jadi tempat i cita,ijan jugak..tak ke sengal tu,ingat ni lagu ku pendam sebuah duka apa..
so i macam nak cuba ubah diri i yg nampak fragile sgt ni tu someone firmer..bukan nak change totally tapi if i tak peduli pasal apa hati i rasa sapa lagi nak peduli..

penat jaga hati orang..
mari jaga hati sendiri pula..

sometimes kita kena dengar apa hati kita kata jugak walaupun otak kte bg warning yg apa kita buat ni kurang bijak..tapi bila hati da berkata2,cuba untuk faham..kita je boleh ubat sakit kat hati kita tu kan?

im just a human being,i got feelings too..

alhamdulillah~

itu saje yang mampu diucapkan..
im quite sad n rase agk kurang satisfied with my result..
berguling jugak i,tp nasib xtersungkur..
but still thanks to Allah..syukur atas apa aje yg i dapat.
nak ikutkan i thought result i akan tersungkur n tersangkut,yela..dis sem mcm2 dugaan i dapat n it was a killer sem for our course but Alhamdulillah i dah lepasi every obstacles eventhough focus i sgt terganggu time tu..
from h1n1 to all sort of emotional prob,i da bolos..s0 wateva it is walaupun dissapointed i still rase sgt2 bersyukur.
ujian hanya diberikan pada yg mampu menanggungnya kan?
jadi tak perlu kalah..what ever happen last sem was over,all i need to do is strive for the best next sem..i just doa dat no more perit,sakit lagi next sem..InsyaAllah
lagipun xperlu salahkan obstacles yg datang..kita boley je buat yang termampu to pass through it

Alhamdulillah..

dont kill Y.O.U

does commitment needs us to change who we're?
does it requires us to slowly betray our desires and dreams?
is it what commitment is all about?
i learned that when we get serious in a relationship,we know that we have to commit.
love makes us commit,it told us that if we love someone,we have to love them assuredly.
yes,that is for sure..
but does commitment means u have to kill the real YOU?

heart full of blister

if and only if im a superwoman..

i wish to change this cruel world..
let the happy ending fairytales lead..
and never let tears rules..
if and only if im a superwoman..
i'll never let myself cry and feel the pain..

p/s:bukan gambar i yang nak bunuh diri

kerana kamu

I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself
Cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did,
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way
To never let it get that far

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake
A smile, a laugh everyday of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I watched you die
I heard you cry every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry in the middle of the night
For the same damn thing

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid..





little angels..b strong
live! eventhou its hard to breath..
smile! eventhou u fake it..
love! eventhou u trust it no more..

life is a fate..n s0 is death

life is a wheel..u dont know where are u heading,u win or lose this game..ceh,i dah mule nk merepek.but i mean it,i mcm sentap kejap bile pkir..life is like a gambling..kita hidup kat dunia,kita dah tahu kesudahan kita ialah mati..tapi antara kehidupan dan kematian,sementara kita tunggu dipanggil tu..we have no idea what is in fr0nt..what going to happen tomorrow,in a minute or even in a second..
thats life,n rahsia hanya ada di tanganNya,yg kita boleh buat berdoa..yes guys,things are not always bright for us but we have to take it positively and redha ngan qada' dan qadar..

i pandai nk cakap,i mean tulis...tapi bila jadi kat i something yang not expected what will i do,n what will happen?thing remains as question..i salu susah hati bler pikir pasal menda-menda yang xdijangka mcm death,accident,sakit n lots of thing..d bad one yang buat kita sedih and memang xbestla..

but as a human kita kena accept the faith..

kematian,death of love ones..nobody knows when he/she akan dipanggil Dia n kita wajib redha and tahu that sume org akan mati-tapi jgn tipu sometimes susah untuk kita terima bila org sekeliling kita pergi dulu dari kita especially those that we love most..
i pon penah rasa masa arwah aki meninggal.That time i was around 10 years old,he died because of diabetes.feels so terrible,sangat amat! sebab dia sgt rapat ngan i..I was in Kuantan masa dia sakit and on d last day of his',i pulang ke kl..never expected that it was the last day i met him and apa yang paling i ingat on the last day..i salam dia,he was asleep n i kejot dia bagitau i nak balik but dia xnak bukak mata n xnak tengok muka i.That was the last chance i eva had to actually talk to him.
I know,masa tu i kecik..dah sangat lama cerita ni tapi the pain is still here..bila ingat of course i sedey,lagi mau cakap kan.and seriously,that was the 1st time someone so close died n it was shocking..memang sangat susah kan,tu baru aki i yang meninggal..ada orang yang ayah,mak,siblings,bf and husband died..how did they overcome it?untuk kita yang masih waras fikiran n masih ingat Tuhan..InsyaAllah kita survive but those yang xboleh??

juga experience i(name pon blog i so jgn rasa mual),baru2 ni one of my friend meninggal because of asthma..not really a friend,tapi dia kawan pada my best friend..diorang kawan yang melebihi kawan,falling in love with each other and all..i cakap mcm melebihi kawan tu salah sebab memg salah,as they are both female..siapa dia tu rahsia i la..back to the main point,my bestie was very2 frustrated,sgt sedih as her bf died.i pon akan sgt sedih if it happen to me,i tau tu..
try to be a good friend,me and few other friend try to consult her,make sure she's ok and all and nak dia totally change after what had happened.Dia dah macam ok after that but soon dia keep on texting us messages yang tunjuk that she cant bear with the loss.Dia hilang arah,dia cakap dia tak boleh hidup and until today dia still hidup dalam dunia dia sendiri..macamane kalau tu jadi kat kita?


kita memang kena redha ngan lumrah dunia ni..tempat ni cuma sementara.siapa yang pergi dulu and sapa yang kemudian kita xda kuasa untuk tahu..
dan kita cuma perlu bersedia untuk hari kita and guys,hopefully kita sume boleh berdepan dengan apa aje yang bakal berlaku.Untuk i dan untuk semua..i doakan kita dikuatkan hati dan iman untuk tempuh lumrah hidup ni..Amin




p/s : masa i tulis entry ni,i dapat berita one of my uncle and his family accident truk.Dia sekarang comma,tapi malam ni bantuan pernafasan akan dcabot..yang ada skarang cuma hope dan doa dari semua.
betapa kebetulan sume ni,hanya Allah yang tahu..

gaduh itu indah?

TAK!

jadi tutup mulut kamu jasmin..
xperlu bersuara..
tiada siapa bersalah..
tiada siapa perlu mengalah..
cuma hati rasa pedih..
macam kena gigit semut je..
jadi diam sajalah

the little girl

Im just a little girl,

Who have dreams that she brought within,

Who have pain she’s hiding deep in,

But please don’t see me as a little girl,

The naïve little girl is only the body I live in..

As breathing started, it’ll stop I bet it will,

But I am still here, still in the body I live;

Don’t tell me what you want the little girl to be,

I love just being me..

I like my hair too be messy,

I like to be mysterious rather than being seen,

I don’t talk nonsense, I am just boring,

I am not looking for attention, it’s not my thing..

I don’t bother if you think I am fragile,

I don’t bother if you think I am too polite,

Or think I am not going to fight back and just keep it inside,

I don’t even listen if you go insane laughing at me,

Telling me ‘oh, come on be a bit wild and crazy!’,

Do you mind if I said, ’it’s not who I am, I don’t live to be silly’,

I don’t go to Leeds to be as smart,

I don’t be a bimbo to get men’s heart,

I don’t like to be perfect and trying too hard,

Because i am not living to please your heart

I don’t wrote to impress you,

I don’t whine of my imperfection,

I just love to hide in the little girl

And this is just the way I want to be..

27 RamadhAn..

im home..eventhou kt pandan Jek,aku xsnggop je nk lpak lme2 kt s.alm tyme2 nk rye ni
no life!!huhu..
evrytime rye i olwiz g0t dis silly pr0b..aku salu xreti nk decide,kt mane aku nk rye..aku mmg lom ade husband tp dh face prob tyme nk rye..aiyoo!!
having 2 house,2 lives is difficult..eventhou aku okie je ngn life aku yg ade broken family ni,aku sedey evrytime nk rye..xdela sedey sgt,tp pning lorh nk jge ati sumer pihak..
taun ni aku rye ngn baba aku..da lme sgt aku xblik Qwantan rye,so i think dis year aku shud celebrate ngan family baba plak..mama??dis year seems like mama kne raye without me..tp die still ade akim ngn uncle..byk sbab aku xnk rye kt Keyel,so biar r aku ngalah btpe nk skitkn ati sdiri kn..
tpakse r aku mbawe diri ke Qwantan..

+++s0 sowie mama cz xdpat nk raye sme..hope u'll understand++